She Broke Into His Phone: Funny or Crazy?

Take heed, gents: if you notice any of these red flags, you may want to think twice about pursuing long-term relationship with her:

• Over-the-top tactics during an argument, like belittling you (“You’re such a wuss!”), insulting people close to you, or making drastic threats (e.g. jumping off a bridge, hooking up with a random guy, telling everyone you’re gay)

• The smallest things trigger an end-of-the-relationship fight, including glancing at another girl for a micro-second, giving the wrong answer to “Does this make me look fat?” (and constantly asking questions like that in the first place) or for not noticing her new hairstyle.

• That goes double for violent behavior; if she settles arguments with fists instead of words, don’t react – just get up and leave.

• She says that she avoids drama, but somehow conflict seems to follow her whether it’s at work (“I swear that bitch from accounting is out to get me!”) or in her personal life (“My ex keeps bugging me to get back with him.,.”)

• Not respecting your boundaries and stalker-ish behavior – funny pranks are ok, but texts and emails that are inexplicably missing are a different ballgame. This also includes showing up at your doorstep or workplace unannounced one too many times.

• The relationship is the be-all and end-all of her life; she’s not happy unless you’re falling off the face of the Earth in order to spend all of your time with her.

But going back to the guy with the funny girlfriend, I think their relationship is in pretty good shape. If he trusts her enough to mess with his phone (which was presumably unlocked or she knows his password), he’s one lucky dude.

(Plus, she gets brownie points in my book on account of her Back to the Future shirt – just saying.)

Generally speaking, relationships are a mixed bag, so you’re never sure of what you’re getting into. But the signs will always reveal themselves at some point.

And when that time comes, you’ll know if you should stay for the long haul – or make a run for it.

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