Dating Advice For Men | Dating Fears
Dating Advice For Men | Dating Fears
Did you know that both men and women have strong fears about throwing themselves in the dating arena? It’s not a battle to the death, but it can end up in heartache.
That’s why before you jump in head first it helps to follow a bit of dating advice for men.
I think a lot of men forget that women also have fears about dating. Just a little bit of understanding and acknowledging these fears can go a long way. Some of the best dating advice for men forget that women are afraid, as well.
Here are the top five fears for men first:
- Rejection
- Loss of freedom
- Fear of failure
- Sexual inadequacy
- The woman’s emotions will overwhelm him
Here are the top five women’s fears:
- Not attractive enough
- No emotional connection
- He won’t commit
- He won’t like the “real” her if she becomes emotional, etc.
- He’ll leave her for another woman
Men and women are biologically different and it helps to acknowledge these differences in behavior when we are considering dating advice for men.
Rather than try to make women like us (or women try to make men like them) focus on ways to bridge that gap.
Men’s top fears center around ego, competence, and freedom. He worries he will be good enough. He worries he will be trapped by the relationship.
Women’s top fears center around their desire for an emotional connection and her identity and attractiveness as a woman.
So, when it comes to dating advice for men, is the answer to stroke the man’s ego and help him hurdle the roadblocks to commitment while helping women nurture their emotions and make them feel loved?
I think the answer lies in taking a moment to control your reactions. Take a moment to think about how something makes you feel and how you choose to react to it.
This will overcome many obstacles.
It’s called pause conditioning. It means recognizing when there is a situation where you must respond and think about how you want to do so.
For instance, consider someone’s motivations. If a guy is giving you the once over, is he a jerk or a perv or is he appreciating your looks and expressing his attraction? You decide and react accordingly. That is probably the best bit of dating advice for men and women I could give.
If a woman calls you a player, do you get bent out of shape and defensive or do you continue on with your charm?
The key, the secret is to stop reacting and acting out of habit. Instead, take control of your reaction right now.
The ability to do this gives you the power and control over our fears and defenses. Instead of reacting and acting out of fear, take a look at why you react the way you do and try to do something different.
If men and women do this, misunderstandings will cease and harmony will ensue. Taking the time to understand why we act the way we do can save us a lot of time, energy, money and heartbreak.